Category Archives: Humor

The Day I Didn’t Take the Pledge

I saw this story about a boy who was arrested for refusing to say the Pledge of Allegiance, and it reminded me of a similar transgression from my youth. When I was in high school, we had to say the Pledge … Continue reading

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My New Low-Impact Drinking Game

Because I hate myself, I have begun to dip into the seemingly endless parade of made-for-TV Christmas movies currently running on the Hallmark channels. Furthermore, because the stories are so contrived and because the acting and direction are so pedestrian … Continue reading

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I need a flux capacitor to fix this…

I recently wrote an article for TidBITS about the app’s resurrected text-box-linking feature. A reader responded with complaints about Pages 7: Whatever, it is still the most ignorant word processing software. I can open a document in Word I made in … Continue reading

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I am not David Redux

[Author’s Note: A couple of decades ago, I wrote the following essay after I was called, yet again, “David” instead of “Michael” during a meeting. It lived on a site of mine for a while until the site, and the … Continue reading

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Ozymandias at Mar-a-Lago

I met a traveller from a strife-torn land Who said: “An orange and empty head of stone Screamed at the people . . . Near it, in the grandstands, Half drunk, a bitter correspondent, whose frown, And wrinkled lip, and … Continue reading

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Comic book cities

I was talking with a friend this evening to distract ourselves from our forthcoming dystopian future, and our rambling conversation came around to comic books: “Most cities in comic books tend to be based on New York, because that’s where the … Continue reading

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It happened again…

Every so often I’ll draw a cartoon and then, a few days or even a few months later, I’ll see that some professional cartoonist has done something that seems very similar to the gag in my drawing. It’s happened again, this … Continue reading

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Math is hard, even to talk about

Imagine how hard math would be to discuss if the length of a number’s name was equal to the number itself. For example, this might be how you would say 1,000: That number you get when you take one, and … Continue reading

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Apple Watch—First Impressions

My Apple Watch, a 42mm Space Gray Sport, is still in the Apple Store’s “processing” phase and hasn’t yet been shipped, but because everyone else is already posting their first impressions, I would be disappointing my massive fanbase if I … Continue reading

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What happened in Super Bowl XLIX

A recap for those who missed it. Balls were thrown. Some were caught. Some weren’t. Some balls that were caught were caught by the opposing team. Fans cheered. Fans booed. There was a fight. The most important thing we learned … Continue reading

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