What your coffee knew in October 2014.
On this day in 2011 according to the United Nations, the number of humans on the Earth reached seven billion.
Your coffee doesn’t have enough trick-or-treat candy to hand out to all of them.
The English Parliament established Henry VIII as the head of the Church of England by passing the Act of Supremacy on this date in 1534.
The brewing of coffee is a daily Act of Supremacy.
On this date in 1675, Gottfried Wilhelm von Leibniz first used the ∫ symbol to denote the integral in calculus.
Your coffee is integral to a fully functional breakfast.
The United States Congress passed the Volstead Act, which implemented the alcoholic beverage prohibition established by the Eighteenth Amendment, on this date in 1919.
Your coffee is in a very black mood today.
On this date in 1925, Fred Waller of Huntington, New York, received the first patent for water skis.
Your coffee wants a deep-water start.
Walt Disney testified before the House Un-American Activities Committee, naming employees he believed to be communists, on this date in 1947.
Your coffee always wondered why Mickey wore those red shorts.
On this date in 1970, Gary Gabelich, driving the rocket-powered “Blue Flame,” set the world land speed record on Bonneville Salt Flats in Utah.
Your coffee wants to be warmed by a combination of high-test peroxide and liquified natural gas.
Russia founded a colony on Alaska’s Kodiak Island on this date in 1784.
Your coffee wants a Kodiak moment.
On this date in 1824, Joseph Aspdin received the patent for Portland cement.
Your coffee has a concrete proposal to keep Portland weird.
The British Royal Navy captured Caribbean pirate Calico Jack on this date in 1720.
Your coffee wants to make your roger jolly.
On this date in 1662, King Charles II of England sold Dunkirk to France for £320,000.
Your coffee wants a flotilla of little ships.
Yasunari Kawabata became the first Japanese author to win the Nobel Prize for Literature on this date in 1968.
Your coffee can wake the house of the sleeping beauties.
On this date in 1951, the first episode of “I Love Lucy” was broadcast on CBS-TV.
Your coffee wants to catch the show at the Copacabana.
The British Royal Mint introduced the first fifty-pence coin on this date in 1969.
Your coffee will give you a ten bob note for it.
On this date in 1792, the cornerstone of the United States Executive Mansion, the building now known as the White House, was laid.
Your coffee wants to call it La Casablanca.
The Outer Space Treaty took effect on this date in 1967.
Your coffee, like the Moon, is the common heritage of mankind.
On this date in 1604, Supernova 1604, also known as Kepler’s Star, was first observed.
Your coffee wants to sit at the foot of the Snake Bearer.
Sigourney Weaver was born on this date in 1949.
There is no coffee, only Zuul.
On this date in 2003, Arnold Schwarzenegger became Governor of California upon the recall of Gray Davis.
Your coffee voted for Danny DeVito.
The first American Chess Congress began on this date in 1857.
Is there any doubt about which color your coffee wants to play?
On this date in 1990, Germany was reunified as a country when East Germany was officially dissolved.
Your coffee wants a Berliner Pfannkuchen.
Nine newspapers published the first “Peanuts” comic strip on this date in 1950.
Your coffee has seen the Great Pumpkin.
On this date in 1992, the Cartoon Network began broadcasting.
Your coffee can animate you.